Fakeindianbbahu's Blog

A Sensitive and Logical Young Indian Female's Blog

How to Talk to an Abused Daughter


Excerpts from this post..http://girlsguidetosurvival.wordpress.com/2011/03/04/how-to-talk-to-an-abused-daughter/

I think we all should read it…

Familial and intimate partner abuse is not accidental. Someone purposefully decided to hurt another person who they consider they have a legitimate right over. Abusers do not hurt strangers even when strangers step on their toes but they choose to hurt their partners and children because they know they can get away with it. The faceless strangers called “log” cross all boundaries of decency and hurt your sensibilities in all possible ways through their mean words and actions to ostracize you, still you do back flips to be in their good books. Aren’t you in an abusive relationship with these people? Have you thought how your daughter feels while living with an abuser?

Your initial reaction of distrust and reprimand of her choice to marry for love just closed the doors for her to come back to you. You judged her once, what are the chances you won’t judge her again. The “log” will say something and you’ll get into blaming and accusatory mode. Basically you cannot be trusted. You lost your trustworthiness, the minute you said “I told you so…” Your daughter has a hard time to believe that you will not judge her and even if you did trust her today what are the chances you’ll not throw it on her face in future. Now you want to help her and you do not know how because you closed the first door of communication with your judgment and now you do not know how to reopen it. Just saying, “Come back and everything will be fine, we’ll support you” is not enough, there is a way to open the door and keep it open. This is how it can be done:

  • Communication Agreement
  • Non Judgmental:
  • No Repercussions:
  • This is not unconditional love:
  • I love you but...
  •  

I love you BUT…Once a “BUT” comes before or after LOVE it is no longer unconditional love.

  • For parents of teens:

Read full at below link

http://girlsguidetosurvival.wordpress.com/2011/03/04/how-to-talk-to-an-abused-daughter/

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March 5, 2011 - Posted by | Indian women

1 Comment »

  1. i like your blog.

    Comment by Sandy | March 16, 2011 | Reply


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